Create + Cultivate

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Create & Cultivate 100: Find New Roads: Daisha Graf

Daisha Graf has a lot of titles to her name. As an actress, dancer, model, singer, influencer, and fitness coach, it’s a bit of an understatement to say she knows a thing or two about managing multiple careers simultaneously. (Really though, when does she have time to sleep?)

Below, she shares her advice for those who want to pursue multiple career interests but don’t know where to start, the biggest lessons she’s learned from working with famous artists by the likes of Rihanna, Beyoncé, and Ariana Grande, and the definition of success that keeps her motivated and inspired every day.  

CREATE & CULTIVATE: What advice do you have for those who want to pursue multiple creative interests but don't know where to start? How do you manage all of these careers simultaneously? Why did you choose to pursue them all instead of honing in on one specific thing? How has this benefitted you, and would you recommend this path to others?

DAISHA GRAF: I think, if God gave me all of these talents, I should use them all. It took me several years to let go of the fact I'm not pursuing one active career like many other people... but then again, I've never done things the conventional way, and I'm okay with that. I will say, I haven't necessarily pursued them all at once. I've allotted solid amounts of concentrated time to them all. Most of my life through college was solely dance (and piano till my senior year of high school.) I was on a professional track to pursue a modern dance career. It wasn't until college at Hofstra University studying for my B.A. in dance where I discovered hip hop. From there, I shifted focus. After college, I studied commercial dance and my career blossomed. Once I felt I had a handle on that field, several years later I pursued music heavily. Then, years after that, I pursued acting (which is present time). I gave each of my interests the proper time, individually, to hone my skills. Now, I now switch hats easily if I need to. Listen, it's a daily journey and there have been plenty of times that I wondered why I couldn't choose a career with a clearer path, but I genuinely feel this arts life chose me.

You started as a back-up dancer who’s performed in some of the largest hip-hop, pop, and R&B acts in recent memory alongside icons like Rihanna, Diddy, Pitbull, TLC, Santigold, Janelle Monae, Jill Scott, Ariana Grande, Big Boi, and Beyoncé, to name a few. What are some of the biggest lessons you've learned from working with them? What advice do you have for other dancers reading this who want to achieve your success?

I've learned that working as a team is always the best and most successful way to run a business, create a healthy environment, and cultivate an electric show. If everyone doesn't feel seen or if the group a a whole feels divided, that's how the show is going to feel... disconnected. I've also learned how important it is to be professional: be early, know how to take constructive criticism, know when to speak up and when to listen, and know how to handle money matters. Being kind goes a long way. Treat people how you would want to be treated. There are been several instances that I have booked a gig "out of nowhere" because someone remembered me from something years before. Also, I had no idea where I was going to end up. I just buried myself in the work. Train, train, train. Stay in class. That is my home base. That is all you have to worry about. Be a good person and work hard. The rest will manifest for itself.

We read that you hope to use your art to effect change, what does this look like for you? What changes are you hoping to make? What messages are you hoping to spread? Why?

I think the arts are the biggest tools of self-expression. Imagine if little kids couldn't draw or play. Imagine if we never listened to or played music or moved our bodies. I genuinely feel that people would be more frantic, depressed, and in a constant state of rage. The arts are our outlets. The arts create safe spaces for this expression that can be understood in any language. Feelings are universal. Also, the arts cultivate an intellectual, critical, empathetic, and creative way of thinking. They promote quick problem-solving skills, team building, unity, and an outlet for all. I truly believe they’re necessities in the human experience. This is why I love storytelling in any capacity (dancing, singing, acting) because it is the space where people from all backgrounds can really SEE each other in new ways. The arts have to be made more easily accessible to all.

How did you make the transition from dance into the world of entertainment and acting? What doors did you have to break down?

I had always wanted to try acting, but my focus had been on dance and music. My music management at the time had a connection to an acting agent and I asked if there was a way to be connected. I was lucky enough to secure a meeting, and I pitched myself. I was honest about my lack of acting experience, but I assured her that I was professional and was willing to train my ass off. I had years of live stage performance and film under my belt already (“Step Up: 2,” “Step Up: 3D,” music videos, awards shows, etc.), so it was just adding a few more layers to what I already knew. She took me up on my offer and here we are. Sometimes you just gotta leap through a door even if you feel you aren't "ready." You never know. Bet on yourself.

Your career looks like a dream run on paper but we all know there is a lot of hustle and hard work behind the scenes. Can you talk us through your journey and share some of the struggles along the way? What is the hardest decision you’ve ever had to make professionally and how did you get through it?

Haha, the "on paper" dream is a trap! Don't believe it. Yes, I have done a lot of cool things. Sometimes I need to take a step back when I'm frustrated to look how far I've come. It is by no means easy. I am a freelance artist, so I do not always know when or where the next check is coming (hence the 3,849 jobs I juggle). I've crashed on many a couch and cried on many a shoulder. The amount of money my family and I have spent on my training throughout my life is insurmountable. The amount of rejection one receives can be daunting at times, but I have this mustard seed of faith that has always stuck with me since I was young confirming that I'm doing what I'm supposed to be doing. The hardest decision I’ve made was to leave everything I knew in N.Y.C., my family and friends, and start anew in Los Angeles. I decided to transition to acting. I didn't feel like I was starting over necessarily, but I did feel I needed a drastic change. I recommend a lot of self-care, finding your tribe, faith, and patience. If you love what you are doing, its easier to let go of the timeline because you know this is what you will be doing in some capacity for the rest of your life. There is some ease in that thought for me. I will never not be an artist. 

You said in an interview that you did not feel you were born with natural ability as a dancer, but you worked hard, stayed disciplined, remained faithful, and grew confident in yourself. What does it take to be successful in your line of work? How much effort, how many hours do you have to put in before you make it? Why?

"Making it" is subjective. I have in no way, shape, or form "made it" in my mind. I feel once I've "made it" there will be nothing left to pursue. I never want to feel that. I will always be striving to be better, learn, and grow. Again, you can't shortcut hard work. Whatever you pursue, you have to train. You have to put in those hours. The work speaks for itself, and if you haven't done the work, it shows. The artists that appear effortless in their work appear effortless because of the tireless work they have put into their craft. They have toiled every day for years to the point where they can let all the training go and be free because it is that deeply ingrained in them. You have to do it every day. Every day. You have to try and fail. You have to fail forward. Then try again. Through it all, remember to have fun in the process because that is why you started. 

You are also an ambassador for DevaCurl. What does your role entail? And why did you choose to partner with them?

Thank God for them! I started going to the salon some 10 years ago in New York. They have shaped and colored my hair ever since. I reached out to their social media department one day in hopes of a collab and we cultivated a relationship. They have hooked my hair up for years and years. I am so grateful. Even after I moved to L.A., I still go to DevaCurl affiliated salons. They have been consistent. Much love!

You're the co-founder of Daisha and Alicia Graf Arts Collective (a.k.a. D(n)A Arts), an initiative you and your sister, Alicia Graf Mack, created that is committed to enriching lives through the arts. Can you tell us more about this project? Why did you start it and what has been the impact on your community?

My sister and I started this collective in pursuit of spreading what we know of the arts to others. My sister, Alicia Graf Mack, is now the director of the Juilliard Dance Department and has a wealth of knowledge through her professional career as a dancer and educator. Together, we can hit many sides of the arts spectrum. We hold several different, affordable workshops, as well as offer scholarships for students to attend. Community service through the arts is important to us as well as there are several communities that have not had arts exposure. We also act as mentors for people who would like some guidance in navigating a career in the arts.

When you hit a bump or hurdle in your career, how do you #FindNewRoads + switch gears to find success?

I go back to my home base and stay in class. I keep training. If I need to take some time away to process some feelings, I'll do that too. Yoga, meditation, quality time with friends, journaling, and time in nature are very healing for me. I practice gratitude and think about what IS working. I dust myself off and keep it moving.

Success is such a broad term and it means something different to everyone. How do you define success? What does being successful mean to you?

Success for me is: "Liking yourself, liking what you do, and liking how you do it," Maya Angelou. To be in complete alignment with how you feel, your purpose, and how you are pursuing it is #goals.

What advice do you have for people reading this who haven’t found their path/passion yet? Where do they start?

I would tell them to be aware of what they DON'T like and stay away from that. Be aware of what things bring you joy, even if they are not the typical things you think could create a career. Stay open-minded and continue to explore those areas. Journal about it! Get ideas down on paper. Also, take some risks and try new things.

There is so much competition out there now, especially in your line of work. What makes you and your business stand out? How do you find/create a unique point of view? What advice do you have for others who are aiming to find the white space and build a unique brand?

It is easy to get stuck in the idea of becoming a person or artist that you think others want to see. This or that thing worked for them, so I have to do it like that. I got stuck in that mentality for a while, but it wore on my spirit. Through a lot of self-work and hard lessons, I found it more serving and, ultimately, more interesting for me to be my unique, messy self. Be YOU. That's what people are drawn to. Nobody wants to listen or watch clones of other people. People want to feel. Be vulnerable. Own your truth and show up as you are. This is why is it such an honor and privilege to be an artist. We get to make people feel. There is such power in self. When someone walks into an audition room, or any space fully grounded in who they are, it shifts the energy.

Whose work do you most admire? Why?

I admire the work of my family. Every single one of them. I also admire Debbie Allen, Phylicia Rashad, the Obamas, Oprah, Meryl Streep, and so, so many more. I feel all of these people have pursued lives of purpose and have persevered no matter what. In the passion for what they do, they have influenced so many people along the way.

What is the #1 book you always recommend? Why?

Oh, the Places You'll Go! by Dr. Seuss. Keep the wonder in your life. Nothing is impossible. If you can dream it, you can do it.

Photographer: Jenna Peffley

Hair: Styled by OGXpert & Celebrity Hairstylist Jillian Halouska

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