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3 Major Salary Negotiation Mistakes to Avoid (and What to Do Instead)

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Negotiating, much like networking, is something we need to know how to do, yet it’s not a skill we are ever taught in school. But unlike networking, making a big mistake during a salary negotiation won’t just cost you a relationship, it may result in thousands of dollars being left on the table. So what exactly do you need to know when it comes to making the big ask? Here are the top three things to avoid doing in your next negotiation.

1. Getting Defensive

Let’s say you have taken on more responsibilities and put in way more overtime than your peers this past year. However, during your performance review, your boss informs you that you will only be getting the standard 3% raise due to budget constraints.  

In the heat of the moment, your heart rate will naturally jump through the roof in frustration.

What to do instead:

Instead of snapping back with how unfair this is, take a nice deep breath and allow for silence. Slowing the conversation down rather than jumping into a response will create space for you to be thoughtful in your answer rather than reactive.

2. Giving In Too Quickly

Now that you’ve given yourself a moment to breathe, you can start to prepare your response. While it’s natural to worry about what will happen if you ask for more, don’t let the fear of rejection keep you from getting what you deserve.

I’m here to tell you that negotiation is a normal and expected part of working. While your boss may secretly be hoping you don’t push back, they won’t become offended when you do (and if they do, it may be an important red flag to take note of).

What to do instead:

Instead of quickly giving in, restate your value and get their buy-in. For example, “I understand that constraints in the budget must be difficult. However, the amount of hours and effort I have been putting in for the company goes well beyond the standard expectations and performance, wouldn’t you say?”

3. Not Aiming High Enough

Lastly, when discussing pay, it’s natural to worry that if you go too high you will either offend the other party, lose the position, or come across as greedy.

However, you shouldn’t lower your expectations in order to come across as more agreeable.  By starting with a “safer” sounding number you are doing the work for them, and negotiating against yourself before the conversation has even begun.

What to do instead:

Focus on the facts and then aim high.

Do your research and get clear on a salary range that is both fair and reasonable. Next, instead of lowering your standards in order to come across as more agreeable, start at the top of the range.  

For the example above, if a 3 to 8% raise is reasonable, don’t lower your expectations to a safer sounding 5%. Instead, anchor high and say, “I was really hoping that given the results I’ve produced in the past year, that I would get at least an 8 percent increase. Do you think that’s something we could work toward?”

Interestingly enough, by anchoring higher, you actually give your boss the psychological feeling that they just got a “deal.” Let them feel the sweet pleasure of a deal, while you allow yourself the sweet reward of a higher paycheck!

So, in conclusion…

Negotiating doesn’t have to be scary or hard. No one will advocate for you in the same way you can advocate for yourself. You are in control of your financial well-being, and you know the value that you create. Now, share it with the world! And most importantly, share it with your boss when you ask for that next raise. This awkward and uncomfortable situation will only last a few minutes, and it may result in thousands of more dollars in your bank account.

About the author: Kathlyn Hart is a financial empowerment coach and a motivational speaker who supports ambitious women earn more. Her salary negotiation boot camp “Be Brave Get Paid,” which teaches women how to confidently own their worth and ask for more, has helped women increase their income by an average of $15,000.  In addition, she is the host of The Kathlyn Hart Show, where she interviews entrepreneurial women about their journey from dreaming to doing.

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This post was originally published on March 26, 2019, and has since been updated.

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6 Tips for Creating a Productive Work-From-Home Environment

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Working from home. It sounds great in theory, but it actually takes a lot of discipline to establish a routine that makes working from home productive and fulfilling. Given that many companies are currently implementing work from home policies to help flatten the curve and prevent the spread of COVID-19, I feel compelled to share my tried-and-true tips for creating a productive work-from-home environment.

As someone who’s been freelancing and working from home for the past five years, I’ve gone through all of the ups and downs WFH life can present—from feeling lonely and needing to talk to someone to needing to get out of the house and take a break (while practicing social distancing, of course). Scroll on for my tips on how to create a dedicated work space, set office hours, eliminate distracts, and more.

Create a Dedicated Work Space

Find a place in your home that you can dedicate to work. This will be different for everyone, and while I highly encourage having a desk, a dining room table or breakfast bar are great substitutes.

I don’t recommend your workspace be on your couch or on anything where you can recline. While I love being on my laptop and having my feet up on my couch, I am never as productive as I am when sitting upright.

When choosing a space for work in your home, try to find an area that has the following:

Find a space that you can check-in for work and check-out for everything you’d typically do while at home.

Set Office Hours

As a freelancer, it’s incredibly important to have office hours. Not only to manage client expectations but to give yourself structure.

Setting office hours should empower you to develop a routine for yourself like you typically would if you had a 9-to-5 office job. You’d wake up in the morning, enjoy your morning cup of coffee, maybe squeeze in a yoga class before you get dressed, and head to work. The same should be taken into consideration when you work from home.

Freelance life is supposed to allow you to do all of the things you want to do with your time. Don’t let it create an opposite effect where you convince yourself to always be on and working just because you’re able to do it from the freedom of your own home.

Eliminate Distractions

It’s so important to eliminate any distractions from your home that would take you away from getting work done. For me, I need my home to be clean - period. If the home isn’t tidy, I’m not focused.

Other distractions I try to eliminate are:

If you find yourself being distracted by a common theme throughout your days, find a way to eliminate that distraction so you can stay focused and do your best work.

Get Out of Your PJs

We all have days where we want to stay in our PJs, but it’s important to get out of the jammies and into something that says, “my day has started.”

Most of the time I will change out of PJs and into activewear or comfortable denim. I’ll wash my face, brush my teeth and hair, put on some CC cream and deodorant, and then get to work. It’s a small effort that makes a big difference.

Talk To Someone

One of the biggest things I didn’t realize about working from home is just how lonely it can be.

You are by yourself all day and unless you have clients who love phone calls, most of your correspondence will primarily be done through email. It’s important to talk to someone; anyone. Make time to pick up the phone and call a relative or an old friend. Schedule calls with people in your network so you don’t lose your conversation skills.

I realized a change in myself probably around my second or third year of freelancing, where I would struggle with conversation because I just wasn’t having any. I’d either talk too long or too fast, have difficulty forming sentences, and just felt awkward. This is not me.

Now I talk to everyone.

I am not shy when it comes to conversation and make an effort to have a casual chat with just about anybody I come into contact with throughout the day. That’s people I pass by when I’m walking the dogs, the barista at Alfred’s, Anthony who does my nails at Olive & June, Mary who delivers our mail… AN-Y-BOD-Y.

Get Out of the House

How many of you working from home and reading this typically don’t leave your house during the workweek? 🙋 I get it.

Your home is your office and your office is your home, but it’s still important to get out of the house every once in a while. Keep yourself active and engaged with things happening in your community so you can get out of your PJs, talk to somebody, and enjoy those office hours! (You like what I did there?)

It’s important to get outside and break away from work so you can actually stay engaged in work.

When I spend hours on my computer without any breaks my mind becomes fatigued, and I become less productive. So I’ll take the dogs for a longer walk, do a workout class on my balcony, or take my laptop to the coffee shop down the road and just take in a bit of new scenery to help adjust my internal boss mode.

So if you’re feeling uninspired or having trouble getting anything done, give yourself a break and get out.

About the author: Audrey Adair is a seasoned freelance communications professional and founder of The Scope, a platform providing resources and community to freelancers and the self-employed. Connect with The Scope on Instagram and join their email list to receive your free resource, The Freelancer Starter Kit.

This story was originally published on March 5, 2019, and has since been updated.

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10 Work-Life Balance Books That Belong on Your To-Read List

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Achieving your career goals, trying to be a successful adult, and keeping your personal life in check can sometimes feel impossible. (If you’re juggling a million tasks and still trying to find time to watch The Bachelor with the girls, trust us, we know the struggle). But no matter how often you may feel overwhelmed, it’s important to know that you can find the balance you’re looking for—it may just take a new way of thinking and organizing your everyday life. 

Luckily, there are resources and mentors with proven methods and insights that will help you find the balance between living your best life and getting to work on time. No one ever said achieving work-life balance would be easy, but with these 10 insightful new books, you will be well on your way to reaching both your professional and personal goals in no time. Written by 10 fierce females who know a thing or two about running their own businesses and carving out time for themselves, you’ll find true wisdom and hope in the pages of these self-help and business-focused books. 

From the creator of one of the biggest natural hygiene companies to Netflix sensation Marie Kondo to a single mother from the Middle East who rose to the top of the tech industry, these books will leave you with anecdotes that will help you find the work-life balance you’ve been craving. If you want to find the perfect work-life balance, add these insightful books to your to-read pile ASAP.

Written by Ashley Johnson, content editor, She Reads.

About the Author:

Ashley Johnson is the content editor at She Reads, an online media outlet that specializes in promoting books and authors with a female-centric approach. In addition to editorial roundups, exclusive author content and thought pieces, She Reads is committed to building a community of readers who love nothing more than getting lost in a good book.

Up next: Gwyneth Paltrow, Marie Kondo, Tyra Banks, and More on the #1 Book They Always Recommend

This story was originally published on March 13, 2019, and has since been updated.

1 in 4 Black Employees Report Discrimination at Work, Most Often as Retaliation—Here’s What To Do if It Happens to You

Imagine that you are the only Black woman on your team at work, and that you’ve recently started bringing up concerns about microaggressions—from your supervisor getting your name (and only your name) wrong to more overt forms of bias such as only giving white employees time off. Now, imagine HR’s solution is to tell you, “We are moving you to a team of all women of color due to your difficult relationship with your supervisor.” 

It seems unbelievable, but that’s what happened to me at my last job, and unfortunately, acts of retaliation at work like this are all too common. One in four Black workers report being discriminated against at their place of employment, according to Gallup. Those rates are higher amongst young Black employees, and 75 percent of respondents said race felt like a factor in their experiences.

What’s more, of all the forms discrimination can take, the U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) finds that retaliation at work is the number one type.

Though common, retaliation at work isn’t always easy to prove

When I was told I was being transferred, I felt like I was in a movie, or an early 2000s reality TV show, and Ashton Kutcher was going to pop out at any moment to tell me I was being punk’d. It didn’t feel real, and at times, it still doesn’t.

“More often than not, retaliation is done through actions that aren't formally recorded, like texts, emails, voicemail, etc., or in-person, which can be hard to document” says Sophia Stephens, a paralegal in Washington state who works on employment and labor law-related cases. “There is no cut-and-dry approach to identifying the warning signs [of retaliation], let alone handling them and navigating a full-blown retaliation or discrimination scenario.” 

Retaliation isn’t often one major event, but rather a steady stream of situations that can leave you questioning your sanity. “It’s very typical for there to be dozens of interactions that are of the ‘death by a thousand paper cuts’ variety,” says Stephens. “They're not outright traumatic and terrible, but annoying and inconvenient enough to be bothersome, which causes people to question and wonder if the interaction is enough to raise concern about or if they'd be seen as the issue.”

As a result, she says people frequently come in to seek legal counsel saying that there’s been a history of interactions with the person, but that they didn't document them all because of that self-doubt.

When things started escalating at my office, I spent months going over every comment management made, every act of preferential treatment given to other employees, every time supervisors avoided me in the office, just trying to make sense of what was happening. I felt paranoid, anxious, and confused every day.

What retaliation at work can look like

According to the EEOC, experiencing any of the below behaviors from your boss could be considered retaliation, depending on the facts and circumstances.

1. You’re reprimanded or given a performance review that is lower than it should be.

2. You’re transferred to a less desirable position.

3. You experience verbal or physical abuse from your employer or management.

4. Someone threatens to make, or actually makes, reports to authorities, such as reporting immigration status or contacting the police.

5. You experience increased scrutiny.

6. False rumors are spread about you.

7. Your work is made more difficult.

What to do if you think you’re being retaliated against at work

The repercussions of being isolated my from my department, being moved to a different team, as well as an increased criticism of my work were more than just hating my job. Being retaliated against—and gaslit by being told this was all for my benefit—took an emotional and physical toll: I couldn’t sleep, I had migraines daily, I was always nauseous, I was losing my hair. I became suicidal.

Unfortunately, fear is a powerful motivator for not only remaining hush-hush over an unfair or illegal situation, but ensuring that any accusations stay in the dark, says Stephens, who also notes that the burden of proof in retaliation cases falls on the employee. “As the person accusing, you have to show that your actions led to someone in a position of power unfairly punishing you for them,” she says.

That burden, in my opinion, was too much to bare, because at the end of the day, all that mattered was who had the power and how they chose to wield it. What got me through the experience was trusting my gut and the support of friends who bared witness to the retaliation who were able to keep me grounded.

When I felt that I had exhausted all of my other avenues, I finally consulted a legal representative, which helped affirm my experiences and provide me with options moving forward. “If it comes to this, speaking with a lawyer that specializes in employment/labor law can be very helpful, even if you do not end up starting a case,” Stephens says. “Depending on your state, an experienced attorney can review the facts of your situation with you, let you know where your case stands, and how you can go about pursuing legal consequences.”

While I was eventually let go from the company, I knew that my career aspirations did not end there. I also knew that I had to use my experience to help others who may be going through something similar, and be the resource I wish I would have had.

Written by Dominique Norman

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Classifieds: Free People, Tastemade, Outdoor Voices and More Are Hiring!

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Check out our fresh batch of job listings every Thursday! This week we have new roles from Free People, Tastemade, Aesop, Four Sigmatic and so much more. Good luck with your job search! 

Are you a company looking to hire? To post your job listing, click HERE.

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Classifieds Nº283:  Chief, theSkimm, Frame, and More Are Hiring!

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Check out our fresh batch of job listings every Thursday! This week we have new roles from Chief, theSkimm, Frame, Amy Porterfield, and so much more. Good luck in your job search! 

Are you a company looking to hire? To post your job listing, click HERE.

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Classifieds Nº281:  Frame, Sakara Life, Parachute and More Are Hiring!

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Check out our fresh batch of job listings every Thursday! This week we have new roles from Frame, Open, Sakara Life, Parachute, and so much more. Good luck in your job search! 

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Classifieds Nº280:  Refinery29, Free People, Levi's and More Are Hiring!

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Check out our fresh batch of job listings every Thursday! This week we have new roles from Eloquence, Refinery29, Open, Free People, Levi's and so much more. Good luck in your job search! 

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C&C Classifieds Nº279:  Alleyoop, Newsette, Vice Media Group, and More Are Hiring!

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August is here, and as a new month arrives, you might be feeling a wave of change in your career as well. 

Kick off the month with a fresh batch of job listings for you to apply from our good friends at Alleyoop, The Honest Company, Vice Media Group, REED Public Relations, and so many more!

To post a new job, just click HERE. Good luck! 

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6 Tips to Be Productive When You're Working From Home

We’ve all had to rethink how we operate over the past few years, pivot the way we work, and reconsider how our businesses function in this new era of remote work. One of the areas we’ve all had to be most adaptable in, of course, is right in our own homes. We work here, live here, and do almost everything here now. Not to mention, we’ve been challenged with a whole new set of distractions.

But there is good news here: humans are remarkably resilient and adaptable. 

That means there are answers to help us solve at least one of the most pervasive new cultural problems related to being at home: the challenge of overcoming the fatigue that comes with the daily grind. Now that we’ve replaced commutes with endless Zoom calls, Slack messages, and TikTok marathons, you’re likely already familiar with the problem.  

Fortunately, with a little innovation in your relationship to work, you have hope of achieving a healthier work-life balance.

As a co-founder of CAVEDAY, a solution that offers focus as a service, I’ve studied and created new methods to help people improve their relationship to work and master the art of working from home so it feels a lot less like a major exhaustion-driving burden and a lot more energizing. Keep scrolling to find out how it’s done.

Batch & Block

Batch your work as much as you can, especially when it comes to meetings. 

Try to only take meetings during set times, such as only two days a week or only in the afternoons. Meeting culture is not a new problem, and, for many organizations, has only grown more pervasive during the pandemic (hello again, Zoom!). So while it’s not always possible to have ownership over your own calendar, find windows of time to block off for your most important work. 

Once you have your meeting days/times set, during your working days be sure to only check your email once in the morning and once in the afternoon. Start with your most important and the hardest task first. This will make a massive difference in your energy level as you won’t constantly be flipping from meetings to emails to task lists.

Define

Before starting your workday, take a moment to write down exactly what you’re working on. Be as specific as you can. For example, if you have a day of writing ahead of you, putting “write blog post” on your task list isn’t quite clear. 

Ask yourself: What part of the project are you tackling? What does “finished” look like? Is this the brainstorming phase, outlining, or actual writing? How far do you want to get? 750 words? A chapter? Clearly defining your work, in a set amount of time, helps combat overwhelm, and allows you to more simply focus on one task at a time. 

Scope

How long does it take you to finish a certain task such as drafting a proposal or creating a presentation? Over and under-scoping how long individual tasks take is a surefire way to always be “on” and to quickly overtire. 

Knowing how long projects take gives you a better understanding of how to plan your day. To figure out how long things take, start with something you do often. No need to rush, but focus on just that one task and time yourself. 

Then, in the future, you’ll know exactly what kind of time blocks to set to get the job done. 

Take Breaks

Research shows that the brain can’t focus on a task for more than 52 minutes at a time. Mindful and intentional breaks actually help maintain your energy. Just pushing through to the finish line quickly ends in fatigue. 

But, be sure to take breaks wisely. The difference between absent-minded and intentional breaks is that you are making the choice when to stop and how to spend your time. Getting caught in an endless scroll is not a mindful break. Walking away from your desk, stretching your body, or calling a friend is an excellent way to press pause before returning to your work. 

Remove Distractions

Simple in theory, difficult in practice. Removing distractions (like turning off notifications, closing the door, and—dealing with the biggest distraction of all—putting your phone away) is one of the smallest steps we can take in order to avoid fatigue. We are constantly bombarded with interruptions (every 11 minutes on average), so the more agency we have on controlling external distractions, the better equipped we are to stay focused. 

Establish Rituals

One of the biggest and most overlooked changes we’ve faced in the new age of remote work, is the loss of a transition. Remember that good old commute?

The loss of that time that signifies the beginning and end of our workday, such as driving to the office, or riding the crowded subway, held a ton of significance in our lives (maybe even more than we once gave credit). 

Whatever that transition was and whether or not you looked forward to it, it was part of your day and routine. That transition time is precious and must be preserved. It’s baked-in time to prepare for and reflect on your day. Without it, we forget to take moments to pause and we wind up being “on” for much longer than intended. 

While it may seem trivial, establish a new ritual to start and end your day. A walk around the block, your morning coffee with no work, shut down or close your computer at the same time every day, read a non-work related article before leaving your workstation. Doesn’t matter what it is and it can be small, but this will give your brain and body a cue for when you’re working and when you’re not.

Our culture promotes shallow work and we’ve gotten really good at being “busy”. But busy doesn’t mean productive. Fatigue does not have to be a way of life. Instead, mindfully approaching your work and time allows for more spaciousness in other areas of your life. It’s not easy to put these tips into practice, so CAVEDAY memberships intentionally make it easier for people to practice these tips, as it’s all baked right into the service. Trust us, it’s worth the effort to master this new way of life. You might even be astonished by the quantity and quality of your output. 

About the Author: Molly Sonsteng is a producer, experience designer, and entrepreneur dedicated to time well spent and deepening human connections. She’s created countless projects that encourage people to live creative and meaningful lives. A classically trained singer, her professional history includes working for Carnegie Hall, Manhattan School of Music, and Daybreaker. She ran a summer camp and a political campaign office, developed a music curriculum, taught preschool, and was the Director of Admissions at a music conservatory. In addition to Caveday, Molly is a cofounder of Madcap Factory, an amusingly eccentric production house helping brands engage their communities.

Use the code CULTIVATE to redeem a free three-hour Caveday session at www.caveday.org/schedule.

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