Are you thinking about starting your own business? Do you have a little voice in your head that whispers ideas and dreams about things you want to create? Are you unsure whether you should listen to that voice?
I had that voice, too, and for the longest time didn’t know what to do with it.
As a half South Asian woman, I was raised to get straight A’s, stay out of trouble, go to a prestigious school, and forge a stable career. I followed the rules, getting law and economics degrees, and spending my twenties working in government, management consulting, technology, and venture capital. Then, just before my thirtieth birthday, I quit my job without a safety net to start my company, Coral, which helps people improve their sexual well-being. (Can you imagine what my mother said?).
There’s lots of advice out there about whether or not to take a risk and run headfirst at a business idea, and the truth is that nobody can answer that for you. But looking back now, I can see two things clearly: The time I spent trying on different careers and identities taught me valuable lessons. It wasn’t wasted. Yet it’s also true that these highly demanding, great-on-paper work experiences were my way of stepping right up to the edge of what I really wanted to do before I found the conviction to close my eyes and jump.
Starting a business is scary. It affects every part of your life. People think you’re crazy, and they’re kind of right. It threatens your finances, your mental health, and your career trajectory. You’ll face judgment from your parents, your friends, prospective partners, investors, and strangers who read about you on the internet. And it’s more likely than not that your business will fail.
Stepping into that vulnerable space—and being comfortable there—is especially difficult if you haven’t been conditioned to embrace fear, and don’t have a model that looks like you. As a woman, I hadn’t been groomed in resilience since my first crush rejected me in the schoolyard, like my male classmates. I’d also rarely personally encountered women in positions of leadership, and had never had a female boss. Successful entrepreneurs, in my mind, were either men or celebrities—people who look and act nothing like me.
So what gave me the confidence to go for it? I had to create the space to acknowledge and examine that knowing inside of me, rather than drowning it out with distractions.
For me, this took meditation and introspection. I sat with my self-doubts and learned the subtle distinction between self-preserving fear and self-limiting fear. I let myself acknowledge the knowing that told me entrepreneurship was my path and identified the narratives that held me back as self-limiting and socially constructed, rather than real obstacles. (And in the meantime, I used my jobs as crash courses in high-growth startups, technology development, and the dynamics of venture-funded businesses until I found the business idea I couldn’t ignore).
So when the idea for Coral came, this time the voice in my head was so strong that not doing it felt harder than giving it my all.
If you’re considering whether entrepreneurship is the right path for you, spend time with yourself, in the quiet. Journal, meditate, go for walks, turn inward. Acknowledge the hurdles, personal and societal, and how they might be affecting you. Think through whether you have the self-belief, resilience, and determination to back yourself and push your idea forward through the obstacles—because it’s not easy, and you will want to give up.
When you stop and ask yourself what you want to create with your one short life, chances are that voice will shout.
And you’ll know what you have to do.
About the Author: Isharna Walsh is the founder and CEO of Coral, a sexual wellness app that offers evidence-based guides to better sex for all humans. Born in Sri Lanka and raised in Australia, Isharna worked for the Australian Prime Minister, Boston Consulting Group, and a Los Angeles VC firm before turning 30. After realizing that nothing that is so essential to our health and happiness is as neglected as sex and sexuality, she raised $3 million in seed funding to launch Coral in November of 2019. One year later, Coral is a sexual wellness pioneer that’s helped hundreds of thousands of people create their best sex lives.
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