Photo: Color Joy Stock Photography
Life is about seeing the opportunity around you, stepping into the vision you have for yourself, and embracing the work it will take to get there.
For me, stepping into the vision I have for myself hasn’t always been easy and there has been a ton of imposter syndrome along the way, but leading is about doing scary things and having faith in knowing you were created to do something amazing.
One thing I know for sure is one bump in the road doesn’t define who you are, or the impact you are meant to have in the world. In fact, if you let it, one bump, or many bumps can inspire you to take the leap to do more with your life. I know this was the case for me.
One of my major bumps in the road was when I filed for bankruptcy. I was a single mom and not in a financial place to handle everything that was coming my way. I remember leaving the courtroom after my bankruptcy hearing feeling ashamed and embarrassed, but I knew in my heart there was something more out there for me, I only needed to have the courage to go after it.
It was then I decided to take a leap, bet on myself and move from Ohio to North Carolina with me, my son, our luggage, my last paycheck, and a rental car. I didn’t have a job, but I was willing to bet on myself and had faith the move would create a better life for us. I was right.
When you feel defeated, it is critical to see the opportunity and not let the moment define you, or your future.
1. First, it’s okay to feel the emotions that come with feeling defeated.
It’s normal during tough situations to feel sad, angry, disappointed, embarrassed, frustrated. It’s important to take the time to acknowledge the emotion, so it can be dealt with accordingly.
When I filed for bankruptcy, I felt ashamed, embarrassed, and irresponsible. I let myself feel all my emotions, I cried and talked it out. As I worked through my emotions, I began to forgive myself, which allowed me to move forward.
2. Ask yourself, “What is the lesson I can learn from this?”
As you face your situation, think about the lessons you can or have learned and how your situation can shape your life for the better.
Thinking about the lessons I learned was a pivotal moment for me because I realized I needed to make more money and be wiser with my financial decisions around money. I needed to think bigger and rethink my career game plan. This big thinking ultimately is what changed my trajectory and situation creating a better life for me and my son.
Which brings me to...
3. Think about the opportunity around you to change your circumstance.
There are opportunities all around us. When you are open to seeing them, you create a whole new set of possibilities for yourself. You have to be able to look outside of yourself, your comfort zone, and be ready to be all in to do what it takes to change your situation.
When I moved from Ohio to North Carolina with no real guarantee anything would work out, this motivated me to apply for jobs outside of my original career field and utilize my full experience. I enhanced my education to help me move up the career ladder faster, I moved into upper management and was part of senior management teams in the C-suite.
Within a few years, my skill set surpassed several of my colleagues and I became the go-to for troubled businesses that needed help with restructuring and streamlining. This experience ultimately is helping me to build my own seven-figure business and helping other entrepreneurs to do the same.
4. Create an “I never want to be in this situation again” action plan and follow it.
When life throws us challenges, it’s important to ask how you can not be in the situation again. Use the lessons you learned from Step 2. Think about the steps you need to take, break down those steps into micro-steps, and take real action to achieve your goals. Don’t delay.
In my situation, after going through what I went through, my action plan was, and is, now to help me never struggle financially again and to make smart financial decisions for my and my family’s future.
This has helped me to do brave things like start my business, continuously invest in my growth and development, travel the world, buy my home, become the breadwinner for my now blended family of four, and continue to keep doing big and scary things.
Remember, life is meant to be lived, so it is never too late to step into the life you want to create and to go after more.
“When you feel defeated, it is critical to see the opportunity and not let the moment define you, or your future.”
—Brandy Mabra, CEO of Savvy Clover Coaching & Consulting
About the Author: Brandy Mabra is the CEO of Savvy Clover Coaching & Consulting and a business and leadership coach. Brandy has 15 years of business management and leadership experience. She has worked in diverse business climates and has turned hot mess businesses into well oiled and profitable machines with engaged teams. Brandy has spent her career building million-dollar empires and now uses her million-dollar skill set to help herself and other women entrepreneurs to do the same.
Brandy is the founder of Savvy Foundations, a CEO mastermind helping other women show up unapologetically savvy in their CEO role and build a healthy and sustainable business generating multiple-six and seven-figures. Because The CEO Skill Set is the Million Dollar Skill Set. Brandy loves to travel and spend time with her family, she believes you cannot build a business on fumes and CEO breaks are required. You can follow her on Instagram at @savvyclovercoaching.
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